Guesstus Flask

Dark Souls fans. Annoying, aren't they? Harping on like no other game was ever any good.

One of the things we're always gushing about is the storytelling and lore. Dark Souls uses videogames as a storytelling medium in a way nothing else does. The story isn't spoon fed to you via cutscenes and reams of text. The story is experienced. It's in the world you explore, the little snippets of information, the characters you meet.

But it isn't, is it? We just play through the game, then get the story from amazing people like VaatiVidya, Epic Name Bro and Bonfireside Chat.

Guesstus Flask is a podcast where four idiots put their money where their mouths are and play through Dark Souls III blind, trying to decipher the story for themselves. They will almost definitely get confused, get lost, and chat some absolute bollocks. But that's the fun of it!

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Episode 14: Dark Souls III Explained

This is it! After a month away (playing Monster Hunter) the boys are back! They’ve all read up on Dark Souls III and are ready to share their expert lore knowledge and their final opinions on the game. Was it worth all the time and effort?

SPECIAL: Why Dark Souls Fans Should Try Monster Hunter

For a one-off special the boys celebrate the launch of Monster Hunter Generations by explaining why Dark Souls fans should try out the Monster Hunter series. Jas and Andy are longtime Monster Hunter pros, Luke has dabbled and wants to get stuck in and Jay has played a demo one time.

Episode 13: Give Her The Eyes

In the grand finale of the boys’ blind Dark Souls III playthrough, we chat about the Fire Keeper enthusiastically consenting to receiving eyes, the Kiln of the First Flame, the fight against the soul of embers and the endings. Unfortunately, the only person who saw two of the three endings was Andy “Curse Hates Wax” Rice. Can the drunken idiot remember how to become a badman?

Episode 12: The Lore Police

Luke, Andy, Jas and The Main One travel to Archdragon Peak to discuss astral projection, the Nameless King, Havel "the Rock" Johnson, Hawkwood and the least taxing speculation ever. Then the Lore Police turn up to cart Jay away.

Episode 11: Goose Snakes

On the night of the EU Referendum, the boys explore a world where all light has escaped the land. Will the UK link the fire or walk away? What is a goose snake? Did Andy even play Dark Souls 3? Join us for in-depth chat about the Consumed King's Garden and the Untended Graves.

Episode 10: Archive Of 80s Tunes

This week we're approaching the end of our area-by-area tour of Lothric as we ascend the Grand Archive. Expect chat about the Crystal Sages, angels, creative uses for candle wax and the works of Cyndi Lauper. 

Episode 9: Metal Crump Dancer

In Episode 9, the boys are joined by special disinterested guest host Alex Musselwhite to talk about the Dancer of the Boreal Valley and Lothric Castle up to the Dragonslayer's Armour. They also manage to discuss dropping cider, forgotten Fromsoft gem Metal Wolf Chaos and world-famous moron Donald Trump.

Episode 8: Don't Play With Katanas

In episode 8, after a brief hiatus, the lads get their shovels out and dig down deep into the Irithyll Dungeon and the Profaned Capital. Guesstus Flask does not condone cutting yourself with a katana anywhere on your body, but especially not the wrists.

Episode 7: Irithyll and... upstairs ;)

All the boys have finished Dark Souls III, and this week they're discussing Irithyll of the Boreal Valley and Anor Londo. The lore chat is starting to get real, and so are the spoilers, so go careful!

That said, you should've finished this game by now. Sort your lives out.

Episode 6: Big Daddy Crab

In episode 6, the lads have made their way down to the Catacombs of Carthus, which is a big cave full of skeletons (and one crab), and the Smouldering Lake, which is very interesting and full of crabs.

Episode 5: Gazing Into the Abyss

Here we go lads, here we go! Getting stuck right into the lore now! This week, the boys chat about the Farron Keep and the Abyss Watchers. Who is that wolf? Is the wolf a knight? How do you knight a wolf? Maybe the pope will know.


Episode 4: Eating Meat and Beating the Deep

In episode 4, the lads have made their way through the Road of Sacrifice and the Cathedral of the Deep, learning very little of any use and misunderstanding the NPCs. Also, Luke ate some hot chicken.

Episode 3: Mary Jane 420

In episode 3, on the 20th of April, the boys talk about the things they saw and the people they met along the High Wall of Lothric and in the Undead Settlement. Mostly, they were pretty chill dudes!

Episode 2: Naked Samurai C***

The game's opening cutscene, first area, and obnoxious naked guard are investigated, laid bare and probably misunderstood.

Episode 1: The Pilot

The boys introduce themselves and the idea of Guesstus Flask, then make a typically bumbling attempt to introduce the world of Dark Souls.